August 06, 2013

My life with wrestling (or when the Poncho Man starts treating this like a real blog)

July 24th, 2013. Poncho Man sits around wishing he could watch Main Event and NXT. This doesn't happen due to them not even being on tv until later that day. Later he plays a show with the band he's in The Lowmen.

July 25th, 2013. Poncho Man gets in a van at 1:30 in the morning and leaves on tour. He has already said "yes" and stuck his arms in the air probably 30 times earlier in the evening. Around 6 PM, The Triple T Threat is driving through the Grapevine outside of LA. Everyone stays dead quiet as he pumps himself up by saying "yes" and kissing his muscles Big Poppa Pump style. Soon it's told to our hero that he scared everyone with his driving. Bums Poncho out. The Lowmen play a show in San Clemente. Poncho wears a yellow tank top.....another professional wrestling reference goes unnoticed. The One Legged P.E. Teacher ends up sleeping in the van in Hunington Beach, CA and downloads Main Event and NXT on somebodies wi-fi.

July 26th, 2013. Sandy Ravage wakes up and proceeds to do DDP Yoga on the balcony of the apartment he's staying at. This is week 14 of DDP Yoga and he knew he had to stick with it. At some point he's trained his band and van mates of the intricacies of the "Yes!" and "No!" Pictures are now peppered with hands in the air exclamations. Stops at Wal-Mart to buy another yellow tank top, and looks at wrestling on DVD. On the way to Las Vegas, Poncho rents a room at Hooters. The Lowmen play a show at the Double Down Saloon. Outside you would have found a few guys doing some DDP Yoga stretches. After the show, 6 strapping men stroll down The Strip. Poncho gets a warning from the cops for "Not following Pedestrian Traffic Signals." Poncho was too busy avoiding traffic and stylin' and profilin' to worry about traffic signals. Someone buys Triple T a yard long margarita. This starts the daily affirmation of "This Is The Greatest Day Of My Life." Return to the hotel around 5:30 AM where it is immediately decided that it's time to put on short shorts and go swimming.

July 27th, 2013. Poncho spends the day recovering. Before going to play a second show at said Double Down Saloon, somebody turns on the tv. Mr. One Legged freaks out because for the first time ever he's seeing Ring Of Honor on a real tv, basic local cable style. He explains to the band how Davey Richards and Eddie Edwards are American Wolves and really awesome, and tries to explain a Cage Match between ROH and SCUM. His band mate exclaims that he enjoys the "double stomp." Show is played at 3 in the morn. Once again, it's time to pass out.

July 28th, 2013. Hey! Get in the van! Mr. Ravage complies. It's off to Chandler, Arizona. Which is basically Phoenix. Show bums Ravage out. It's in a strip mall and not many people are there. The people that were there got a rad show. After, a few of the bands (who had now played 3 shows together) all took pictures. The X-Pac/Syxx Pointing Maneuver comes out in all it's glory. We end up at a house in Tempe drinking until 7 in the morning. Everyone has now accepted the Poncho Man as the Freakzilla he is.

July 29th, 2013. Time for some DDP Yoga in the dining room of our new friend Joel's house. Right in front of the air conditioner as it is about 104 outside. By now, people are beginning to understand that the mix of exercise, cigarettes, energy drinks, positivity, and booze will keep you feeling fresh and awesome forever. Even with extreme lack of sleep. It's into Flagstaff, Arizona. Flagstaff recharges the Poncho Man with a really fun show, great cool weather, and some Shawn Michaels stretching before and after the show. By the way, our singer/drummer has everyone in the crowd stick their hands up and say "Yes!"

July 30th, 2013. We wake up on Fremont St. in downtown Las Vegas. Staying at a nice hotel called "The D"..........

This is where Tristan "Tre" Tower The Triple T Threat The One Legged P.E. Teacher The Poncho Man Sandy Ravage takes a break. He'll continue his adventures and commentary TOMORROW!

1 comment:

  1. Keep it real Daddy OOOOOHHHHHHH YEEEEEEAEAAAAAAAAAHH

    ReplyDelete