December 16, 2017

What's this PPV called again?

I seriously had to Google "WWE PPV tomorrow" because I couldn't remember. It feels like they haven't really talked about it, and seems like a mess in the wake of Survivor Series. I'll try to break things down, but first.

Woke up a little hungover and ready for the Oregon Ducks Bowl game that is happening today. Alas, it doesn't start until 12:30 so I'm stuck watching ROH Final Battle until then. Woe is me. Matt Taven and Will Ospreay just had a really entertaining match.

Zack Ryder vs Mojo Rawley on the Pre Show
The match that gets Breezango and the Bludgeon Brothers on the main show. I think The Marshall and I talked about this through text. They had been teasing Ryder turning heel for like a year, and then we got swerved. If I cared about either guy this might be a good story. Did we have an abbreviation for the Andre? Or is it just called the Andre? Remember when Rawley won the Andre? Sure used that as momentum.

Breezango vs The Bludgeon Brothers
This week's Fashion Files was segregated to I watched it. It's always entertaining. I think we're supposed to believe that The Bludgeon Brothers were the big bad all along. I watched a Ride Along with Breezango. Fandango was dryly telling Breeze that he could name every state capitol. He proceeded to get one of ten correctly.

Baron Corbin vs Bobby Roode vs Dolph Ziggler for the United States Championship
I don't have any recollection as to how this match came to be. I think Ziggler has his music again, but now he strolls to the ring like Orton. The miscasting of everybody in this match is very evident.

The Usos vs The New Day vs Benjamin and Gable vs Rusev and English for the Smackdown Tag Team Championship
I guess this stems out of the Usos/New Day feud with everybody else getting involved. Rusev and English are a joy to watch. Rusev Day is everyday. Btw...I think that whole gimmick came out of a Total Divas episode where Lana throws a "Name Day Party" for Rusev; which is a thing in Bulgaria. I gotta figure out when Tristan Day is going to be.

Charlotte Flair vs Natalya in a Lumberjill match for the Smackdown Women's Championship
So Natty is getting her rematch a month later, but with the Riot Squad (sic) debuting since (fish stick break...yum) they need a match that can introduce all the new characters without throwing them to the wolves. These new lady factions make no sense, but I guess it's because they tend to do 3x3 matches at house shows with the ladies. So this was an easy way to create teams.

Randy Orton and Shinsuke Nakamura vs Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn with Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan as guest referees
I guess the intrigue is which referee is going to turn heel and they've been teasing DBD. We all know that Shane is already a heel because of "#underseige." This is a whole big shades of grey story. Orton and Nakamura are just bodies needed to tell the story of the other four guys.

AJ Styles vs Jinder Mahal for the WWE Championship
So, apparently Jinder lost in India to Triple H. So the talk is that the Jinder experiment must be over. But then he's headlining a PPV. There was this special on the network called WWE365 and it was all about Owen's last year in WWE. At one point they show this backstage quick convo between Owens and Vince. He asks if he did good and Vince says "that was exactly what we were looking for." Owens also tells a story of Vince telling him that something sucked. So I imagined that Jinder asked the same thing after some of his matches an promos, which have all been quintessential WWE/Vince McMahon booked segments. They all just reek of McMahon jizz all over them. I think he's done a great job at doing exactly what he's been told to do. But the booking tells us that they don't believe he's done a good job at all. I'm not a huge Jinder guy, but it all seems fishy. Alas, AJ will probably have a great match.

I hope that was what you were looking for. I'm not sure if I had any better insight than the podcasts did this week. It's very much a throwaway show. Which means it will probably be really good cause isn't that what happens? Punishment Martinez just had a bunch of lame gross looking people worshiping him. He has a dumb gimmick. Whatever happened to that Kevin Sullivan managing thing?

Still hungry. Fishsticks not enough.

December 04, 2017

Rusty report featuring Mom