A Survivor Series Preview with The Poncho Man

I have no idea if Rusty is reading these on the long hard road. His tour ends here in Eugene. You have a place to stay if you need it. I think I work till nine that night.

Watched reDRagon vs The Time Splitters on the bus coming from Autzen Stadium last night. It was a lot of fun. I like Bobby Fish almost too much. Working my way through it. Speaking of NJPW....Rusty...would you be interested in watching a NJPW PPV with The Marshall and I if Jim Ross was announcing said PPV? Because that is happening.

To spoiler or not to spoiler......tons of big time rumors for tonight's show. I kinda want to talk about them, but I guess I won't.....here's some white text with some names....

Roman Reigns
Randy Orton
Sting

 That last one is kinda crazy bananas. The others...ho hum.

Supposedly Fandango is coming back tonight to face TBA on the preshow. Then I read Bad New Barrett is coming back on the preshow. Then they haven't announced an Adam Rose vs. The Bunny match. Could this all be connected?! Or partly connected? Now I can't find anything about Fandango. I'm so confused.

Alicia Fox, Natalya, Naomi & Emma vs. Paige, Cameron, Summer Rae & Layla (Divas Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Tag Team Match)

Sorry, I cut and paste that since it was too much typing. Let us hope for a Paige vs Emma feud that will be horribly botched by the writers of RAW.

WWE Tag Team Champions Gold & Stardust vs. The Miz & Damien Mizdow vs. Los Matadores vs. The Usos (Fatal 4-Way Match)

More too much typing. I have nothing to say about this match. I will watch it. I'm sure I will enjoy Mizdow, and parts of the action. Yep....

AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella
This will sound weird, but I feel this whole ppv is built around matches that they did a fairly good job putting together storyline wise, but I don't care about any of them. Brie might get some revenge here....I think 30 days is almost up or something. Whatever

Dean Ambrose vs Bray Wyatt
Oh yeah...I care about this match...but the build has been horrible. Bray Wyatt doesn't like Dean Ambrose because Dean's dad was a deadbeat? I don't even understand. For this to work, you need to introduce us to Dean's dad. Show us that he's awful and that's why Dean is weird. But now, in my head, Sister Abigail (which works as an imaginary character) and Dean's dad (who doesn't) mean nothing to me. So yeah...this match will probably be good, and it has done NOTHING for either of these guys.

Team Cena vs. Team Authority
I think this could be a cluster of run-ins. Which might be fun. Make this shit crazy. Throw spaghetti at the walls. Do whatever. I don't even care who wins. Make Erick Rowan the last man standing! Why not! He's got a beard! He should be over! I've kinda enjoyed the build to this, but I realize it's probably just gonna be crazy town in the ring for 45 minutes leading to the spoilers up at the top.  Who knows.

I keep yawning from staring at the screen typing this. This is probably my worst preview yet. Sorry.

Poncho Man's Hell In The Cell Preview!

Hello!
So Rusty, you missed nine hours of coastal wrestling watching. We watched AJ Styles lose the IWGP Heavyweight Championship to Tanahashi. Most importantly, we watched a one legged Michael Hayes (PS....no relation) win a match.You also missed chips, salsa, guac, and queso. Alas, I couldn't convince the Marshall to do some DDP Yoga.

On to the preview

Mizdow TV
This is the preshow. This will be great since Sandow is stealing the show. I feel like I commented a few years ago about how The Miz actually gets heat. Lately, he gets generic heel heat, and X-Pac heat. It's really not all the dissimilar to Cena. Who gets X-Pac heat from me and gets Mojo Rawley heat from others. The point of this....Sandow is an incredible talent and might actually be being booked the best way possible.

Dolph Ziggler vs Cesaro for Intercontinental Title
I don't really remember what the story is for this, but it's 2 out of 3 falls and should be great. I actually got really excited for this match when I heard about it. Then I realized that Ziggler loses matches on RAW and Cesaro hasn't really done anything since Wrestlemania.

Goldust & Stardust vs. The Usos for Tag Team Titles
Now I don't even care about this. I'm just a Goldust mark and I always have been and just like how I feel about Shawn Michaels...I always want him to break free from whatever he's doing and just win things.

Big Show vs. Rusev
Sorry, beating up R-Truth, Jack Swagger, Big E, etc does not make me care about you. They don't matter. You don't matter. Lana still looks nice.

Brie Bella vs. Nikki Bella
The loser has to be the others' personal assistant for a month. Wow! This might have been fun two months ago when I mildly cared about this. Now I'm just worried about Nikki freezing her eggs and how John Cena is going to show his ass in a movie....

AJ Lee vs. Paige
Still hot. I'm excited and nervous about Paige being on Total Divas. I don't want to not love her. I read that the reason AJ Lee will not be on Total Divas is because of her husband. Who just happened to be on the Art Of Wrestling last week. He of course was bitching about fans. He's really bitter for a millionaire. It's weird how much I still like him.

John Cena vs. Randy Orton in the Hell In The Cell
Again? RKO out of nowhere? Remember when bitching about CM Punk vs. Ryback or CM Punk vs. Ryback and Paul Heyman. was okay thing to do. And whoever wins this will have a chance at Brock Lesnar....in January!? I'm so confused. At this point...I won't be surprised if John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar is the main event of Wrestlemania.

Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose also in the Hell In The Cell
Well, hopefully this will be fun and eventful and new. I wouldn't mind if no one wins and the feud continues.

Maybe Michael Hayes will hop on down the entrance and interfere. That would be exciting. He is the OVW Television Champion for christ sakes!

This PPV sound boring. Sorry guys. 

Poncho Man's Night Of Champions Preview comment

Poncho: This was too long to leave as a comment to your post.

Rusty: There is another awesome Poncho Preview Post before this, which should probably be read first.

Poncho and Rusty:  We have ridiculous fun watching wrestling together.  My house is awesome.  I propose a meet-up here at my place in Seal Rock during the second week of November, sometime between the 8th and 15th, or thereabouts.  I'll turn [a bigger number] on the 11th, and could ask for nothing cooler.  But here now, the commentary,

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Yay content, hooray!  I was so excited to see there was a new post this evening, and I had fun reading it too, as always.  Stuff kept popping into my head as I was reading, so I might as well write it all out... which I guess I usually do, and end up leaving huge ass comments... more content!  So be it.  I think about wrestling so goddamn often throughout the day, might as well.

Firstly, let me address my status as a WWE-negligent wrestling fan.  I do keep up with the basics of what's going on.  I do watch Raw sometimes, though it's often in fast-forward.  It depends on how much internet buzz the episode has, which I admit is dumb because I have no inherent respect for the hive-mind bullshit opinions of the wrestling forums which I use to determine whether I'll watch or not.  As a wrestling fan, I'm kind of ashamed that I'm missing most of Bray Wyatt and Dean Ambrose's stuff, but apparently not so ashamed that I'd be willing to sit through 2.5 hours of hokey promos and (arguably) hokier wrestling.  But please don't think I'm indifferent.  I'm an actively disappointed fan.

My favorite thing going right now is Stardust.  I get your logic that it cheapens Goldust, but I have a different take on it.  I feel like Cody is less of a Quasar to Goldust's Green Lantern, and more of a Beta Ray Bill to Goldust's Thor.  He deepens the mythos of Dustin's journey as his character, and for me Cody only adds to his brother's legacy, while again proving that he can innovate in a time when most don't even try.

Damian Mizdow is another show highlight for me recently, though that doesn't give me any reason to look forward to watching the Miz wrestle anybody.

Jericho/Orton?  I thought for shizzle when Jericho did the huge cage-jump (radical pre-jump shrug by the way) that would be his "out" to go back on tour.  He usually puts over a less established guy on his way out.  Is Orton going to kill him?

"3 inch off the ground jumping thing."  There you go, Michael Cole.  "superman punch" is out.  It's probably copyrighted anyway.  If Roman Reigns's jumping thing is a Superman Punch, then I think I Superman Parallel-Parked My Car today.  I had at least three feet to work with, both in front of and behind the roadside space, but I still came in askew, no less than 16 inches off the curb.  At some point during the 8 minutes it took me to select a hotpocket to buy, make the purchase, microwave, and then eat said hotpocket at my favorite restaurant this evening, my driver's side mirror had been cracked and jammed back by traffic.  Superman Parallel Parking My Car, ladies and gentlemen.

Just kidding.  I parked my car like a Fucking Champion and ate a boss ass supper at a fine old joint.  Only illustrating a point.  Next time I will tell you about Superman Blog Comment Writing, in which everything is concisely stated.

True Story:  When I went to dinner tonight, following the waitress on our way to the table, I walked right by a grown dude wearing a "Oliver Humperdink has a Posse" t-shirt.  For some reason, my instincts allowed me to do this without making any kind of a fuss.  Believe me, I took a looooong look at myself in the mirror when we got back home.  Who am I?  Someone who doesn't need public validation for their love of pro wrestling?  No, fuck that, I should've said "nice shirt."

A Rollins-Ambrose match on PPV would make it.  Because wrestling.

Lesnar/Cena.  Don't care.  At all.  If I was watching this match in the arena live, and some dude behind me kept screaming "Cohabitate", I would not turn around to give him a dirty look.  Lesnar is a great performer and maybe the most draw-worthy physical wrestling specimen since Andre the Giant, but against Super-Cena, he's not Lex Luthor, he's Doomsday.  And those "Death of" comics might have sold a lot of copies, but I've read them already, and didn't care them the first time around.  Now, if only Cena would disappear, allowing his powers to disperse into 4 worthy vessels.  Cesaro: Steel; Fandango: Cyborg; Ambrose: Superboy; Wyatt: Eradicator.

I think the only guy I'd really be excited to face Lesnar would be Lex Luthor himself, CM Punk.  I mean, Bryan is a great heel, and is even better as a babyface, but Punk is a great tweener, and I feel like that's the kind of energy that would need to be built to have a "big fight feel" against the monster everyone loves.  With Heyman in the mix, it seems predestined.

Also, your rant about Cena reminded me of when he beat Batista in a "last man standing" match by tying him upside-down to the turnbuckle with duct tape.

Also also, sorry for all the DC references.  I'm a Marvel guy.  Let's go Wonder Man!  Wonder Man Sucks!
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