Poncho Man's Helly Celly Belly Welly Jelly

I did a DDP Extreme Headstand today. It was sweet. I saw The Marshall last week and apparently I'm gonna see Mr. Nickels  tomorrow. HORSE FEATHERS (with the voice).

Ziggles, Neville, Cesaro vs Sheamus, Rusev, and King Barrett in the previous show.
Real barn burner here.

Charlotte Vs Nikki for the Divas Championship
Hmmmm....the Paige vs Natalya feud is actually more entertaining, and everything was more fun when Sasha wasn't wrestling and the crowd would just chant "we want Sasha." They should waited until it was fever pitch. Charlotte has kinda been a dud....except for watching her dad cry more. Which always makes me happy for some reason.

The New Day vs the Dudley Boyz for the Tag Titles
I kinda see the New Day losing here. Let me explain why.....2 months from now is the TLC PPV. So wouldn't it make sense for the heels to win back the titles in the Dudley's. Also....

The John Cena Open Challenge for the US Title
If it's not Daniel Bryan blowing the roof off and winning....I think The New Day will be sharing the US title for a few months. That would be awesome.

Owens vs The Ryback for the Intercontinental Title
Let me tell you the Secret....Kevin Owens has good matches with everyone because he's one of the best professional wrestlers today. Crazy huh!?

Bray Wyatt vs Roman Reigns in Hell In A Cell
Hopefully this just turns into Reigns cutting a really long awkward promo. Because it's so bad, it's getting over....at least in my house....when I sit and laugh and laugh and laugh.

Seth Rollins vs Demon Kane for the WWE World Heavyweight Title
If Kane loses, Corporate Kane gets fired. This should happen at all publicly traded companies. The upper brass should keep there jobs based on fights. Anyway, as it was when Kane wrestled Daniel Bryan for the title....I have little intrigue because it feels a little predetermined.

Brock Lesnar vs The Undertaker Hell In A Cell
Dude, it's gonna be awesome when Brock throws Taker off the cage into the announcers desk. That's gonna happen right? Anybody watch the Austin podcast? It just reminded me why I didn't enjoy Brock the first time around. That he's more of a meat head than everyone else. But, now I just love his matches. As for Taker, this storyline is so confusing because his promos are uninspiring and he should be a heel, and now Brock is heeling it up...and I guess everything is just shades of grey. I know this though....today I'm underwhelmed....Sunday I'll wake up and go "Holy shit.. .Brock vs Taker is today!"

I can't think of anything else. This week my favorite wrestler is AJ Styles. James Storm in NXT was garbage. I'm sorry for his luck. And scene.

pre tour rusty report

THE NEW TRIPLE THREAT> LEX, DOUGLESS AND ROLLINS

RUSTY REPORT!!!!!

Long time no see fellaz! Shoot man. I miss yall. You still watch that pro wrestling? I kinda do. Really just the ppv's anymore even tho i love some of the roster. Here is a list of random stuff.....

THE NEW DAY: I wasnt interested at all when they started. I thought it was a waste of  people i already liked. But shit man, the are great. I love everything about them. And the audience does too. When is the WWE going to catch on that the fans like to have fun and it is ok to have this kind of stuff? Git with it you pricks!

SETH ROLLINS: This guy is my new fav. I think he totally rules and his matches are awesome. ANd he is working with the company to make it better which i like. I also love his matches with Cena. I'm sorry but I think Cena is great when he wrestles indie guys. And i just think Rollins rules all around.

I still love Brey even tho they made him lame.

I still love Owens even tho they made him lame

I still love Ryback even tho he has always been lame.

I dont give two shits about Ziggles and the Russian guy at all even tho i like them. That story sucks absolute ass even tho it should be great. I'm a big fan of pressed together boobs so i should love this. But i dont. Sorry

I'm really glad the 3D are back. I always said that Buh Buh Ray was the best talker in TNA. If they let him loose he would be great.

Brock rules and Heyman is the best talker in wrestling ever.

I dont watch Divas stuff at all because I just watch porn to look at naked girls. I watch wrestling to watch wrestling. I feel like they get ripped off and I just cant watch even tho i like some of them.

Well that is it my dudes! Ill type ya some on the road!

WWE Night Of Champions Preview

So....I missed a SummerSlam preview!? I feel like a terrible person. It's almost like I've spent the last month or so doing nothing but tons of exercise and making bad decisions. Did I say that I'm gonna run a half marathon? Well I am. I really want a 13.1 sticker. That's my only reason.

The Cosmic Wasteland vs Neville & The Lucha Dragons
Rick Victor is now in a stable. Pretty Awesome dudes.

Dolph Ziggler vs Rusev
Lana broke her wrist. I liked her high top high heels. Oh...and Dolph gave Summer earrings apparently. I think he wants a three way.

The New Day vs The Dudley Boyz
Did you guys sign the petition to Save The Tables? This is great stuff. Can't wait for the TLC match we're sure to get down the road. Everything about The New Day is the best. I care about Kofi now! Finally!

Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns, and Mystery vs The Wyatt Family
Who you got? Baron Corbin? Joe? Or is it DBD? I may be in the minority, but I like this. Perfect spot for these guys....even though Bray will probably never win anything for the rest of his career.

Charlotte vs Nikki Bella for the Divas Championship
Charlotte wins right? Or does hottie (not as hot since you bimboed yourself out on Total Divas getting engaged when you didn't want to) Paige heel it up and cost Miss Flair? Revolution! With minimal stories!

Ryback vs Kevin Owens for the Intercontinental Championship
Kevin hates The Secret. Perfect reason for a feud. He also eats apples while Ryback can't seem to find food. The devils in the details.

Seth Rollins vs John Cena for the US Championship
This will probably be a pretty good match where Cena flubs one or two moves that he shouldn't be doing, but we will give him credit because he's not doing the same five. I wonder where they go from here.

Seth Rollins vs Sting for the WWE World Heavyweight Title
Rollins should watch Michaels vs Hogan from SummerSlam and just do the same thing. Slightly over sell  everything because it's awesome and fun. Alas, I don't think even Sting's tag team partner Jesus will help him win. Should be fun.

I ate entirely too much candy today, and I like it. Thanks for the ROH show Marshall. It works! Rusty, did you really open for the Colts!?! I was watching The Big Show DVD set and found a new Rat Classic that I'll hopefully post soon. Well well...nothing more to say...Poncho Out.